25 replies to this topic

[Black.Ghost]

Out drinking in Germany last night and a so called mate came up to visit us all. Anyway the night was going ok, on talking terms with the ex which was a big bonus.

Anyway, my mate was all over my ex. Another mate told me not to worry about Sara wasn't interested in him in the slightest etc. Yeah so much for that. The slimy mate then had the cheek to come and talk to me about the 'Ring, and despite never driving it informed me he could beat me round it easily - apparently Sara had told him about my little crash last time. (Althoough I was informed by the other mate that Sara had never said anything bad about me, which was something I guess.)

And when I woke up this morning, it turns out he was in her bed last night. And he knows damn well Im still in love with her.

I don't think I've ever wanted to smack someone so hard in my life. So despite it being a good night and getting laid, I was still pretty angry.

Rant over.

[minili]

He does sound particularly slimy and punchable, but... If you're allowed to get laid why isn't she?

Edit: *opens can of worms*

[Black.Ghost]

I never said she wasn't. It was just the way he went about it that annoyed the hell out of me. I would never get with a mates ex like that.

I really genuinely hope she does find someone who makes her really happy. And if that turns out to be him then so be it.

[Calman]

He does sound particularly slimy and punchable, but... If you're allowed to get laid why isn't she?

Edit: *opens can of worms*

Way i got it it was that his mate should of stepped back

[Mini-Mad-Craig]

I think that by quoting "mate" we highlight the most important moral of this thread,- Find some new friends buddy.

[mini_mad69]

Yes it's not nice for him to have done that. Although, the more you get hung up on who your ex sees fit to see, the harder it is to get over her I think.


My "mate" has slept with 2 of my ex's. Although he keeps making jokes about it, never realy told him its not cool though.

[danie garry]

to be honest its not really a mate that would do that, if he knew u wernt over her would he have done it?? if he knew and still did it u have the unwritten right to give a bloddy nose!!!

[Black.Ghost]

I think he knew, and I don't think it would have made a difference.

Yeah I know it wont help, but Im not bothered by who she sees, it was just the way he went about it. And the way he said the stuff about the 'Ring and the car crash just made it worse.

[Ivor Badger]

You will find out over the years, that the best way to get rid of any woman is to pass her on to someone else and believe me there are quite a few I was pleased to rid myself off. They can then drip at their new man and don't keep phoning to drip at you. You also have the opportunity to tell them to go and drip elsewhere. You might not think it just now, but you have probably been done a large favour.

Old chinese proverb says "be careful of what you wish for, because you might get it"

[TashHaggertay]

Jeez!
I swear i've just replaced men in my life with my mini! Minty the mini is the only man i need!
Atleast your mini will never screw you over.....unless it's raining really hard!

chin up and just keep reminding yourself that you've got a better car !

[davidv]

Yes been there to in the old past no fun and mates not when they are like that the women was up for cheating like some men try again with new mates and a new women Friends in life are rare

[blacktulip]

sorry to hear of your no*head mate, but have you ever thought she might have done it on purpose? is there any chance she saw you with this other girl? just trying to put 2 and 2 together.

[daveholman]

I have to say that I agree with blacktulip on this one. That was my first reaction when I read it before. She saw you with another girl and did the one thing she knew would annoy you to get back at you cause, let's be fair, copping off with some random girl is hardly the best way to show her you still like her.

In reference to what your mate did then I can't see any complaints, the whole fact that you copped off meant that you probably went out looking for it which he will have noticed and thought that she was, therefore, fair game. I have a mate who's the same, he's like a dog on heat constantly and will try it on with any female in the vicinity, this includes ex girlfriends, sisters and anyone else who isn't currently romantically linked to another member of our group of friends. He has tried it on with every female mate I have ever introduced to him. He is still, however, the best mate I have and probably ever will have.

I agree that what he said about your crash was a bit underhand but it's the classic situation where it would have been a laugh if he'd said it to someone else, but it touches a nerve when you're on the recieving end of the insults. It's the way of the world, it's happened before and it'll happen again just like the sun will rise and the tide will come in and out. Now I sound like my dad. Great.

And before everyone starts telling me I'm wrong, I'm just looking at it from a neutral point of view plus the fact that I know how my mates head works. People have different ideas of what is morally acceptable. I wouldn't dream of acting like my mate does but it certainly doesn't mean I think any less of him for it.

Lecture done for today, thank you, class dismissed.

[Black.Ghost]

Some interesting points. However...

Firstly, it turns out nothing actually happened between them, he just spent the night in her bed apparently. Which doesn't really change all that much. I was never annoyed with her, she is young, free, single and can do whatever she likes.

My mate had been all over her from pretty much the start of the night, way before I met the girl I got with. I also made every effort to stay well away from Sara with her as the plan was never to wind her up. Plus she was the one who ended it and pretty much made it clear its permanent. Getting back together might take a miracle...

The car crash thing on its own I don't mind so much - everyone has been having a laugh about it and that's fine. It was just the whole lot together and the smugness with which he said it.

However, Im done with it all now. Nothing like this has ever got to me before and Im fed up with letting it get to me. I'll just put it all down to character building and that is the end of it.

</rant>

[paul6266]

it is always the rule never get with a mates ex but at the end of the day you just need to respect her feelings, if thats what she wants to do then so be it....you cant control anyone its a sad thing i know but sounds to me like.....well not being harsh.....but i think you need to move on