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Just For The 'pun' Of It


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#31 lkopferschmitt

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Posted 27 July 2014 - 09:56 PM

I hate hoovering, it really sucks...



#32 Miniminx71

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Posted 27 July 2014 - 10:22 PM

Got complimented on my driving skills earlier. Someone left a note saying "Parking Fine" on my windscreen. Nice it was noticed.



#33 The Matt

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Posted 28 July 2014 - 04:28 AM

Velcro is great stuff, but it's such a rip off.

#34 The Matt

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Posted 28 July 2014 - 04:29 AM

I hate those little Russian dolls....They're so bloody full of themselves!

#35 Berrybox

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Posted 28 July 2014 - 08:30 AM

Before a mother knows the sex of her baby it's a hidden agender

#36 Tamworthbay

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Posted 28 July 2014 - 08:32 PM

I’m good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet … I don’t know why.

As a kid I walked the plank, we couldn't afford a dog.

#37 Ben_O

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Posted 28 July 2014 - 08:36 PM

The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.



#38 Ben_O

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Posted 28 July 2014 - 08:38 PM

I stumbled across a nudist camp the other day. There is a hole in the wall, the police are looking into it...



#39 Tamworthbay

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Posted 28 July 2014 - 08:57 PM

100,000 wigs were stolen yesterday, Police are combing the area.

A man charged with making fake Viagra was acquitted after the prosecution failed to make their case stand up in court.

#40 The Matt

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Posted 28 July 2014 - 09:13 PM

I bought some Viagra eye drops the other day. They're supposed to make you look hard.

#41 mike174

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Posted 28 July 2014 - 09:28 PM

I took Viagra once but it got stuck in my throat, I had a stiff neck for hours!

#42 M J W J

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Posted 29 July 2014 - 12:39 PM

A piece of string walks into a pub and the bar man says " I don't serve bits of string" so the string leaves.

 

The piece of string frays the end of him and walks back in. The bar man says "I don't serve bits of string" so the string leaves.

 

The string ties a knot in himself and walks back in. The bar man says "are you a piece of string?". The piece of string replies " I'm a frayed knot".



#43 Ben_O

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Posted 29 July 2014 - 12:55 PM

My local butcher backed into his meat grinder today. He got a little behind in his work



#44 HarrysMini

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Posted 29 July 2014 - 12:59 PM

How does NASA organise a party?

 

They planet.



#45 HarrysMini

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    I do not have short legs!!!

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Posted 29 July 2014 - 01:02 PM

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent. 






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