616 replies to this topic

[bpirie1000]

There was a roman empirier who never got past the age of 19...
His name was constant'teen.

[bpirie1000]

My kid asked me if trees pooped.
I said where do you think pencils come from.....

[bpirie1000]

My best friend said i was a liar.

I don't believe him..

[bpirie1000]

I saw a man walkin gup a hill pushing a trolly full of four leaf clover, horse shoes and rabbits feet. I thought to myself.

Wow he is really pushing his luck..

[bpirie1000]

At our works BBQ i made a steak for my boss.
He said.
I like it, well done.....

I said thanks alot...

[bpirie1000]

At the age of 65 my grandma started walking 10 miles a day.

She is 92 now and we have no idea where she is...

[bpirie1000]

My dad has a very important job. He works for a bicycle company.

He is the spokesman.

[bpirie1000]

I bought an alarm clock that swears at you instead of beeping..

It is a rude awakening...

[bpirie1000]

I want to start a new diet.

But i feel i have way to much on my plate at the moment....

[bpirie1000]

My son asked me what it was like to be a parent.

I wasn't really sure what to say...

So i woke him up at 3am. To tell him that my sock came off...

[bpirie1000]

I was out for a jog yeaterday and ran into a lampost.

Lucky i only sustained light injuries...

[bpirie1000]

Came home from work to find out my son had been on E.bay all day.

If he is still there tomorrow i will lower the buy now price...

[bpirie1000]

I no longer see my wife and kids. I feel guilty, it is all because of gambling.

I won the lottery and moved to Hawaii...

[bpirie1000]

Do i enjoy making jokes about jail.

GUILTY......

[bpirie1000]

Why did the physical education teacher split up from the english teacher.

There was no chemistry.