896 replies to this topic

[toyboy396]

Deep cuts are to be made in the guillotine industry...

 

Heads will roll

[Miniminx71]

I regretted becoming a vegetarian. Missed steak

[Tamworthbay]

My sister swallowed a mouth organ last night. It's typical of our Monica

[Tamworthbay]

A government warning said that anyone travelling in snow or icy conditions should take:

Shovel, Blankets or Sleeping Bag
Extra clothing including Scarf, Socks, Hat and Gloves
Waterproof Boots with non-slip chain attachments.
24 hours supply of food and drink
De-Icer
5Kgs of Rock Salt
Torch or Lantern with spare batteries
Mobile Phone
Road Flares and/or Reflective Triangles
Tow Rope
5 gallon can of Petrol

First Aid Kit
Jump Leads


I looked a complete pratt on the bus this morning.

[Tamworthbay]

The wife says she's fed up with me doing my flamingo impressions.
I've had to put my foot down

[Ben_O]

A visual Pun courtesy of my Mum.  She has the same humour as me.

 

[dprac1ng]

Why do we never see elephants hiding in the trees?

 

 

 

Because they're really quite good at it...

[Mini Mega828]

anyone hear Andy murry has been sposered by viagra?

itsbecause he can only achieve a semi

[jccc78]

Velcro what a rip off

[Tamworthbay]

anyone hear Andy murry has been sposered by viagra?
itsbecause he can only achieve a semi

does he use Viagra eye drops to make him look hard?

[toyboy396]

Just been to give blood and now feel exhausted....

 

Its such a draining procedure.

[megamini_jb]

A government warning said that anyone travelling in snow or icy conditions should take:
Shovel, Blankets or Sleeping Bag
Extra clothing including Scarf, Socks, Hat and Gloves
Waterproof Boots with non-slip chain attachments.
24 hours supply of food and drink
De-Icer
5Kgs of Rock Salt
Torch or Lantern with spare batteries
Mobile Phone
Road Flares and/or Reflective Triangles
Tow Rope
5 gallon can of Petrol
First Aid Kit
Jump Leads
I looked a complete pratt on the bus this morning.

(Run out of likes)

[toyboy396]

I dont trust stairs....

 

They're always up to something.

[jccc78]

I was offered a 52" LED tv today for just £30   as volume was broken

well I couldn't turn that down    

[Ben_O]

When we raised the alarm at work today, the midget's were furious