896 replies to this topic

[xrocketengineer]

 

you'd think by now that they would just call it Zealand

 

and York and Jersey.

 

Oh wait. Hang on a second...

 

I think that they can't, it is still New....

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zealand

[Ben_O]

 

 

you'd think by now that they would just call it Zealand

 

and York and Jersey.

 

Oh wait. Hang on a second...

 

I think that they can't, it is still New....

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zealand

 

Well i didn't know that!

[DJS911]

I just saw an old man perform a tribute to the England football team:

He got off the bus, walked around a bit looking confused and lost, got back on the bus and left.

[SecretSugar]

Archaeologists were excavating a pyramid in Egypt when they found a mummy covered in chocolate and hazelnuts. They believed it was a Pharaoh Rocher.

 

What music does cheese listen to? R & Brie

[DJS911]

Although Groucho, Chico and Harpo Marx were hugely successful their brother Skid was a lot less popular.


I've got IBS like my Father and Grandfather. It runs in the family.

[SecretSugar]

I like playing with scissors, just for the shear fun of it

[SecretSugar]

INVITATION - We are hosting a charity concert for people who struggle to orgasm...if you can't come, let me know....

[xrocketengineer]

And now the most famous British singing cowboy....

[New game mini]

A Mexican magician tells the audience he is going to dissappear on the count of 3. He says "unos, dos.. *POOF*

He disappeared without a tres

[DJS911]

I'm told by a very reliable source in Westminster that Boris Johnson's appointment was a mistake.
Apparently Theresa May was given a list of possible ministerial appointments and wrote "F Off" next to Boris' name.
Sadly her press secretary thought she meant Foreign Office and issued a press release before the error was spotted.

[DJS911]

Borrowed from I'm Sorry I haven't a clue......

Secular - How the Queen describes the shape of her wheels
Onesy - Selfie taken by the Queen
Kinship - someone who is angry describing their boat
Ethos - Yorkshire musketeer
Fairy - what cats feel like in Liverpool
Shingles - a game of tennis with Sean Connery
Urdu - a hairstyle in Liverpool
Countryside - killing Piers Morgan
Testiculate - to wave one's arms around whilst talking *******
Ovaltine - a fat adolescent
Transport - cross dressing athletic event
Warehouse - someone who turns into a building at full moon
X Ray - a former fish

[M J W J]

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Pokemon

Edited by M J W J, 17 July 2016 - 09:37 AM.

[xrocketengineer]

When I mention to non Mini people pot joints and LSD's they get all excited, until they realise it is about a Mini.....

[SecretSugar]

What's an Australian kiss? It's the same as a french kiss but only down under!

[SecretSugar]

I'm close friends with 25 letters of the alphabet, I don't know Y

 

What do you call a pile of cats? Meowtain

 

Yes, I built a bridge....get over it

 

What does cheese say when it looks in the mirror? Halloumi